In this thing called life, there are some light-bulb moments that appear out of nowhere and
knock you over the head like a dump truck of particularly potent ayahuasca. Examples: finding the Santa costume stashed in your dad’s dresser, realizing the cast of Saved by the Bell was actually comprised of people in their mid-20s, finding out Bruce Willis was dead the whole time. But all of these mind-shattering, reality-wrenching revelations pale in comparison to what I’ve been going through for the past two weeks and 180 seconds.
I've come to realize that, for some time now, I've been living three minutes in the future.
Ever since I got my first cell phone, I've trusted its clock as an infallible source of temporal reference, the only timepiece I assuredly knew would and could deliver an exact reading -- no matter what. It adjusts for daylight savings. It adjusts when I travel in different time zones. It's always been on the ball. Until now.
What happens when the most reliable thing in your life is suddenly exposed to be just as frail and fickle as everything else around you? You lose your shit, that's what.
It all started when I noticed I was showing up early for things -- something I am not necessarily against, but hardly known for. Dentist appointments, office meetings, fist fights arranged via Tinder... I thought I was just growing into a more mature and sensible human adult. Nope. https://www.thrillist.com/tech/nation/my-iphone-clock-is-3-minutes-fast-how-to-fix-your-iphone-clock/tech
